Whilst the Luxe in the Cottage renovation chugged and spluttered along at an alarmingly slow pace, we were holed up, in a hole. In the past seven years we have moved five times. Now despite working in finance I am no Mensa advocate, but even I know that is quite a lot. I’ve actually just tapped it out on the calculator as I have nothing better to do on a Tuesday night and its roughly once every 504 days.
The kids were sharing a bedroom with wallpaper falling off the walls and the cats were so stressed they had taken to peeing in there as well. Honestly my poor children. I am surprised they have come out of this experience so surprisingly well-adjusted (well as normal as the crazies will ever be). It could not be said the same for LOML and I. We were not quite so compos mentos. We had taken to eating and drinking to quell the stressed bile that rose up in our throats when we started to discuss the Devil Budget and the escalating time scales, both of which were going entirely off plan.
They are going to totally kill me for this picture in 10 years time but you get the gist.
There were some fun bits. Like the time we sat up until 1 o’clock in the morning searching and comparing the prices on Victoria Plum and Victorian Plumbing (does anyone actually know the difference between them?) as the builder had suddenly declared he needed the bathroom suites. And the time we spent four hours in a bathroom showroom having the bathrooms priced up by a man who questioned my taste at every turn and made me want to punch him in the nose. “You really are from Essex aren’t you,” he would scoff when I asked why he didn’t have any gold taps in the showroom (which, I might add, have become a massive trend in both bathrooms and kitchens and rightly so, they are gorgeous).
It wasn’t much fun at this stage however I needed to keep the end goal in sight and that end goal was a luxury looking bathroom for a less than luxurious price. I’d lusted after a real copper bath and we even bid on a few on eBay but these had soared past the price we were able to pay. So eventually we decided to invest in the best we could afford and luxe it up with some saucy tiles and colourways.
A freestanding bath had been something I had only dreamed about. We found one at Victoria Plum that we loved, along with some black and chrome taps which were something a bit different. We opted against tiles in the shower area as I detest cleaning grout (I am OCD but also a bit lazy) and went for some lush oxidised copper effect Showerwall panelling. This turned out to be an absolute sod of a job to fit by all accounts but the finished effect is stunning.
After our 120th visit to the same tile showroom (we were all mates now, honestly they loved it when we turned up yet again with the five-year old that liked to run screaming around the showroom) we came across some glass tiles stacked up on the floor in one corner. A bit of ‘good cop bad cop’ later and we had secured them for a princely sum.
LOML and I spent some time looking at showers. After 6 months in The Hole showering with a head that dribbled a teaspoon of water a minute, we had completely lost our heads and ended up splurging on two all-singing, all-dancing digital Mira showers that apparently you could turn on from your bed. In hindsight, these delicious showers were worth every penny and I cannot tell you how good it is to stand under the waterfall head and actually feel really clean and not just slightly damp as we had become acclimatised to.
Well that’s me done for now. Thank you for reading and I hope you’ve enjoyed my ramblings. Please feel free to leave me any comments. If its anything to do with my Essex taste, then don’t bother LOL.